sad sad sad

i hate ***. i really dun like him cos he took QQ away from me.i feel so sad n unloved cos QQ hardly spends time w me anymore. im no longer her top priority or her most beloved sister. cos he took her away from me. i feel like crying every night when she's not w me but HIM. :(:(:(

i noe e way im reacting may seem as if im so selfish. but i juz cant help it. i mean it's too sudden for me to take? it's a drastic change la. from seeing her n gaying n playing w her every nite to not even saying more than 10 sentences a day cos she comes home so late. all this happened in less than a month! i noe she has started sch n all n she's very busy. but i bet she eats w him more often than she eats w us. e time she spends w him is more than she spends w us. u can count e no of times she comes home for dinner a wk w a mere one finger.n she hardly eats dinner w us on sat anymore.whenever she's free, she'll go out w him. i guess e family is longer her first priority. not even 2nd i guess. cos it will b *** n her frens.

i noe QQ may think tt im selfish whenever i ask daddy to bring us out for good food when she's not eating w us. but i dun really mean it. im juz being silly, thinking tt u'll eat w us by saying tt. sigh but u still left us eating by ourselves:(
mid autumn festival is supposed to b a day where e whole family gathers together to eat mooon cakes. but mommy wont b in spore n u'll be going chi garden w him. ok so he's ur family, not us. so dun blame daddy n i for eating 'the line' without u. cos it's selfish of u too if u blame me for enjoying e gd food w/o u.u forced me to do so. why cant i enjoy myself w daddy while u're enjoying w him?

everytime when u're still not back early in e morning, i feel so lonely n worried. i noe u insist tt u told us not to wait for u. but do u think we can slp well when u're still not back? esp mommy n daddy. n u still take it for granted. u're really mean sometimes. havin fun n enjoying yourselves while making daddy n mommy worried. so what if *** has a car, so what if he sends u home? can he guarantee tt u'll b safe?!?!?!?!

when u had gastric on thur nite, u were so hostile to mommy when she asked u to take medicine. she's juz doing it out of concern what. oh well but to u, our concern is NOTHING compared to ***. e concern fr e 3 of us does not touch your heart like his concern for u did. i can really tell this fr what u wrote in ur blog. i dun c daddy,mommy or me mentioned when u blogged bout tt nite. but i saw his name. i noe tt despite what we've done for u, we din alleviate ur pain but he did.
n u were so inconsiderate to call him at 1am n wake me up fr my slp. i hav sch e nxt day ok! wanna lovey dovey, dun do it in front of me! when i told u i wanna sleep, i hoped tt u'll juz hang up n sleep w me.oh well but u went over to your room n continued talking to him. AH WHATEVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!

as u said in your latest entry,"no one has ever made me feel so loved n happy", i guess we really mean nothing to u anymore. sorry. but pls dun blame me for hating ***. cos i juz feel so neglected n unimportant ever since he became part of ur life.

i noe im selfish. but i had to blog bout this to relieve myself fr e depression cos i hav no one else to turn to. my life is shattered:(

i wonder what time u'll b home again this morning? it's already 2.27am............

bored

oh no i think i am watching too many movies! hahaha juz watched the maid yesterday. it was a scary experience k! i din really watch cos i was so scared! i took out my pw reading material "Alternative Medicine" to cover my eyes fr all e evil shit. n can u believe it? i still screamed cos e sound effects scared e wits out of me! i ended up only seeing e subtitles n e non-scary parts! totally defeats e purpose of watching a horror movie! hahhahha!

i watched charlie n e choco factory too! w casmud! it was funny n lame!oompa loompa! willy wonka willy wonka. i loved e song! hahaha went to e new nlb w bev before meeting up w andy n ash. they were late by the way! hahaha nothing great bout e library.juz went to look for our pw materials. haha but andy said e upper floors were veri nice. oh well we missed it bev! shall go nxt time! oh n i think long john is casmud's fav dining place! hahha cos every time we go out we'll hav our meals there!

promos r coming. pw's driving me mad. im scared. i'll try to work hard! ahaha but lemme enjoy first! going to msia for geog trip soon! hopefully it'll b fun!

gaying away! having lotsa fun! 

the five of us at campfire! :) 

blogging once again:)

ha everyone's blogging now. even charlene tan! hmm so maybe i shld blog more often? okay i'll do it if i hav time!

mid years r over. results r back. did fairly okay. but now promos r coming n PW's KILLING ME! 2 more months to everything. im so screwed. scary~~~~ haha! but i cant wait for open house! all e fun once again! oohhhh this yr passes really quickly man! i thot orientation 1 was juz over? oops lagging!

went back to ahs for falcon scouts' 45th anniversary campfire. it was really fun! i mean it was such a long time since i last had a campfire! brought back lots of memories. we did silly things to amuse ourselves (n our juniors too i think)! taking photos, jumping arnd on e dancefloor, crapping n tapping each other's shoulders! it was really great to c all of us together again. jelly,char,ziyun,me,jing,sheena,yixuan n all e guides! although sheena,yx n e other guides were busy w their dance, it was still great to c em again!
oh ya e gateway tt e scouts built was so high! im afraid of heights k! stupid ashvin was laughing at e end of e gateway where he helped us down. GAY! saw ms charis wong after a loonggg time too!

had national day celebration today in sch. but i think it was kind of a flop. not much patriotism felt cos almost e whole programme had no link w national day! cant believe it cos i felt much more patriotism back in ahs. haha! e only fun part was 05A51 winning e marcoroni competition! cos i did part of e counting! together w jasmine, bev n xq. yay! we rock! n yeps not forgetting mass dance too. it was fun, gaying w e senior class.haha!

yay casmud outing again on thur to watch charlie! ha i cant wait! e movie muz b nice! charlie awaits casmud!

ps: piano exam on e 17th aug.8 more days! im getting nervous! i muz pass grade8!